Chumpville Chronicles 2014
Part 01 - Contact

It was a rainy, windy, hot night in Chumpville (all stories start like
that except ones that start Once Upon a Time)

(Ok you win). Once Upon a Time it was a rainy, windy, hot night in

Chumpville. The Mayor was leaving City Hall after an extremely busy

day haggling with his personal assistant Miss Ann over permits filed

for a dance studio in the back area of the new liquor store. She had

followed him down the steps. "Come on Ann, you got to quit fighting

this", he pleaded, shaking his head in frustration. "You know mayor

I've known Skip for a long time and I'm not sure what he intends on

doing with that extra room, there could be some hanky panky going on

there". She was empathic and determined. "But he did say he would give

you private dance lessons". "Mr. Mayor I know how to dance and you

should know that, how many times have we spent at the Cabin slow

dancing"?  "Well my math isn't all that good, but dammit the Godfather

has made some kind of deal with Skip and a bribe is on the table".

(His honor didn't want to divulge that little tid-bit of information.)

"See that's it!" She yelled throwing her arms up in the air for

emphasis. "They have some kind of deal set up to supply cheap booze for

Godfathers night club in Hooterville". The Mayor just shook his head

and mumbled something under his breath. As he loosened his tie he

could hear the flag high above city hall flapping in the breeze. "You

want a drink"? He asked ".   "Yes I do this wind is blowing my hair

all over the place, bet I look a mess". You look just fine", he put

his arm around her shoulder and gave her a little squeeze. "Let's go

to that new Mexican place, I'll buy dinner".  "Sounds great", and she

smiled as they strolled down Main Street towards Tequila Tuesdays.


Meanwhile Homeless Jim who had become the town's 2nd bum was up on The

Hill above Chapel Hollow. He had struggled to find work and a place to

stay. Since city civic projects manager Viv had yet to secure funding

from the stingy City Treasurer for a new homeless shelter he had just

bummed around town and sleeping where he could. Officer Mike had

actually let him spend a couple days at his apartment but he couldn't

stand the constant re-runs of Mayberry that Officer Mike watched over

and over to see his hero Barney Fife. So he hit the streets again. He

had heard rumors around town about The Tunnels underneath the city. He

learned of a secret entrance above the parking area on the hill where

the Pink Ladies and T-Birds of CHS went to make out and drink beer.

That's were he was now after Boot Scooting Flirty had given him a beer

to make him go away after she had caught him looking in the car window

where she and Mac the Knife were parked. Now high on the hill

overlooking Chumpville he paused and drank his beer. As it started to

rain (you just knew it was going to start raining didn't you) he

thought he saw a flicker of light to his left. He pulled his baseball

cap down tight on his head and moved slowly towards the light being

careful not to slip on the wet grass. Down in the parking lot Rizzo

was sitting straddling Doo Wops lap. (Yes I know Doo Woo Daddy is gone

but he was one of the original T-Birds and he'll always be a part of

Chumpville.) "Did you see that?" Suddenly she stopped squirming on

him. "See what"? " I was just getting ready to ..."  "Look there it is

again" she yelled!!.  Flustered he turned  to see what all the

commotion was about. "Ok what the hell did you see"? "A light

flickered up there and I could see something walking", she said as a

shiver ran up her back. "That's probably coming from Bubba's little

hideout in the tunnels where The Bag Lady visits him and they drink

cheap wine". "That might be true but what was that I saw walking"?


Homeless Jim moved closer to the light. The wind was really kicking up

blowing the wind almost sideways. "This must be the entrance to the

tunnel", he thought to himself. (The Tunnels were leftover from the

Gold Mine that flourished back in the 1880's when Chumpville was

founded. Prom Man had used them to smuggle in drugs among other uses

in the past. ) Suddenly he thought he saw something moving inside the

tunnel. He dove behind a cropping of rocks, his heart was pounding. He

peered from behind the rocks and took another look. Something moved

again. "WTF was that"? He thought. He stood up to get a better look

when all of a sudden he heard something behind him!!!!

To be continued in Part 2